Food is one of the first battle of wills a child can win, and they will often use their will to express their need for control. We have researched and compiled 12 tips to break the vicious circle and battleground dinnertime can be, but also a few tips on what not to do.

1. Keep a positive attitude

Make eating time an enjoyable time for all of you. Not an easy task when your child makes his best effort to whine the minute there is talk of food. Make sure you and the rest of the family enjoy your time together. Keep a positive attitude towards food and what you eat, talk about how good it tastes and how special the meal is.

2. Try new things slowly

Introduce new foods or tastes slowly, don't expect amazing results to something you've made an effort with, but your child has never tasted. Don't give out and try again after a few days.

3. Serve with confidence

Take a few moments before serving the food, making sure that you truly believe your child will eat it. Serve with confidence and no doubt, your body language will speak louder than pleading words.

4. Cook together

Let you child be part of the preparation of the food. From the time he can stan, your child will be able to participate with small things. At the very least he can be able to stir or add spices. As he is more steady on his feet and has developed his motor skills, your child will be able to cut up soft vegetables with a blunt knife and add them to the pot. Give plenty of praise and make sure everyone knows he cooked the food when it is served.

5. Encourage

Don't get into a habit of giving out when your child doesn't eat, encourage and even offer bribes in forms of simple activities after the food, such as reading a story. Make sure the reward is related to the effort he makes at finishing his dinner. If your child is a very fussy eater, be happy with him just tasting the food or eating one item, for a reward. Increase the amount of food he needs to eat, over time. Avoid food rewards that will fill him up or satisfy his hunger, such as desert. Icepops, fruit, books or time together is more than enough.

6. Be flexible

Every one has individual taste buds. A child should not be in charge of the menu, but excluding some few items he really dislikes is fine and will make him feel that his opinion is important as well. Make deals at times, while many children will refuse to eat up, they will be willing to eat a specified number of spoons full, disregarding the fact that they'll end up eating all the food on the plate.

7. What they eat elsewhere

Take note of what your child eats while in childcare or at friends homes. You'll be surprised that he might refuse carrots at home, but will eat them quietly at a friends house.

8. Be wily

Hide food within food. There is no rule that says that you cannot do burgers with grated carrots, celery, onions, garlic, peppers, and so on. The same goes with the ever popular spaghetti bolognese, add anything you want as long as you grate it. If they refuse vegetables, just put them through a mixer and make it into a pulp that can be added to a plain tomato sauce. If they refuse meat, try other protein sources, such as pulses. You can buy pasta made out of chick peas in most health food stores, which looks the same and has only a slight difference in taste.

9. Grow and shop together

You can grow one cabbage even in the smallest garden or at worst case in a pot indoors. Start with something simple as cress, that can be grown on a wet paper towel and sprinkled over a salad or any food after a few days. Make your child proud of his produce and engage him about the food. If you have black fingers, let your child be part of the shopping. Let him choose one vegetable he would like to eat or is interested in. Next time make him choose another.

10. Keep an eye on snacks

Make sure you know what and how much your child snacks between meals. He might just not be hungry by dinner time. If the snacks are healthy, vegetables, fruit and such, make his dinner portions smaller. If they are unhealthy, change or cut them out completely.

11. Proper sizes

A child's stomach is as big as their fist, and their food portion does not need to be any bigger than that. Make sure to have a good look at his fist, you will doubt your eyes. To ease your doubts, this is why children need to eat more often than us and why healthy snacks are good for them. It is better that he finishes his portion with ease, rather than struggle through an adult size portion of food.

12. Be honest with yourself

You are struggling to get your child to eat, but have you looked at yourself or your partners attitude towards food? Is either of you a fussy eater? We all know children learn by what they see, not what we tell them. You could try changing your habits as a family, not just starting with your child.

What not to do

Do not offer an alternative dinner

Let him walk away from the table, rather than offering another dinner. It's a trap you'll never get out off, and your child's demands on what we will or won't eat will become more and more specific and limited each time.

Do not obsess

It's not the end of the world if your child doesn't finish his dinner. No child will wilt by missing one or even three dinners. See what your child eats over a full week, he might have good days and bad ones, but over a week he might be eating enough.

Don't give up

What your child refused to eat a few months ago might be totally acceptable to him today. Don't shy away from foods he has refused in the past.

Do not force

While it's practically impossible to force a child to eat, try not putting that negative energy around eating and food. Set certain standards, such as having to taste the food, and make sure he understands that this is the food available and there are no alternatives.